It’s been 4 and half years since my life changed. 4 and half years since I was diagnosed with a heart condition while I was 37 weeks pregnant with my littlest baby.
That moment of my life, without a doubt, was singlehandedly the most frightening I’ve ever felt. Hearing the words mortality, rupture, open heart surgery, ICU, was like living a nightmare. I was about to become a mum for the third time and while I should have been embracing the moment, I was scared out of my wits as to how it would all end….But thankfully with the support of an amazing family, wonderful friends, the best cardiologist I could ask for and the strength that all of this provides for me to keep on keeping, I’m still here to tell my story!
This week I had my annual heart scan. This past year has been a very busy one. Between work, the kids education and sport and the busy day to day chores of life with 3 kids, how can life not be busy. We travelled to the States where my daughter decided to split open her head – cause that’s not going to give your heart a scare! Our son was diagnosed with anxiety, OCD and a motor and vocal tic – that’s enough to raise my blood pressure most days! I trained for my first half marathon and to date have run 2 now – this was always going to be a question of is it too much?
But after lying there, feeling sick to my stomach like I always do during my scan on Wednesday, it was so delightful to hear my results hadn’t altered since my last scan. Yippee!!! I was so relieved. It’s always the fear of the unknown with my condition. You just never know. Although I look and feel fantastic on the outside, without that scan who knows what’s happening on the inside. What deteriorates my condition is high blood pressure and thankfully mine is always low but you just never know!
Last year’s scan, for the first time since diagnosis, there was some deterioration. It was only slight but it was movement. I was taken back to all the emotions I felt when I was first diagnosed – scared, overwhelmed, anxious, timid. But that was my scan after I lost my nana – that movement was clearly from a broken heart;(
My aorta is now dilated to 4.6cm. It’s still just sitting in the moderate range as severe is 5cm and I shall do everything in my power to maintain this to avoid open heart surgery. Each day I make conscious decisions on my food intake, I exercise 5-6 times a week, rest when I can, sleep as much as I can and do things for myself that make me happy!
Next month I see my cardiologist to discuss my health and any further plans that need to be made. But for now I will keep on keeping. I will enjoy the small things in life. I will laugh out loud when I need to. I will remain as calm as I can when I really want to rip someone’s head off (lol). I will appreciate what my life consists of and I will be grateful everyday the moment our little angel baby was conceived, because without her, who knows how long I would be on this earth to tell my story!