Close Call….

I would consider myself a thrill seeker. One who loves adventure and isn’t scared by much – other than creep crawlies!! But on Saturday, for the first time in my life, I saw my life flash before my eyes and it was far from thrilling and I was scared out of my wits!!

I set out for my normal weekend long run at 6.15am. It was a cold quiet Saturday morning where traffic was concerned – clearly people had the right idea to stay in bed all snuggled in the warmth. I had 15k in front of me to get through. I had no expectations other than to not stop and get it done. As I set off I was feeling good. I was reaching each kilometre within 5.15 – 5.30 minutes and I had plenty to think about and good tunes to listen to so the kilometres were ticking by quickly.

Before I knew it I was into my 5th kilometre and making a good time. I was at the part of my run where I was about to cross a main road to take me back into the back streets of Runcorn, to head towards home for my fuel! As I looked to check for traffic, I had nothing coming to my right and only one car coming towards my left. I crossed the first part of the double lane road to the island and waited for the car to pass me. As the car, which was in the outside lane when I first looked passed, I stepped out onto the road to cross the remaining road. What I didn’t realise is that the car had changed lanes!!!

I shit myself!! If I had of taken another step or a wider stride, the car passing would have taken me out. I can’t believe how close I came to being hit by a car! I was so dirty at myself. It was completely my fault as I hadn’t looked for a second time to double-check where that one single solitary car was. There wasn’t another car in sight. I felt bad for the driver who didn’t communicate at all with me and just kept driving. I made a split second wrong decision which could have done some serious injury to me or even cost me my life!

For a moment all that went through my head was OMG, f$&@, OMG, that was so close, f$&@, I’m so lucky!!!! Then for the next 15 minutes my life seriously flashed before my eyes and I realised how serious that could have been. What if luck wasn’t on my side? What would have my life turned into? My children…they may not of had a mother, my husband a wife! I felt scared, frightened, fragile and still so angry at myself that I would put myself in this situation.

I ploughed through my 15k and never stopped like I planned. But I was shaken, annoyed and embarrassed. I’m an adult and should know better. I’m a mum and should be more vigilant. When I came home and told Kane I required cuddles, lots of cuddles and I coped the constructive criticism on the chin from my family and I took the cuddles from my babies all day.

I learnt a valuable lesson from my run and close call. Life is here not to be messed with and no matter what never leave anything up to chance. You have to make sure everyday all your ‘T’are crossed and all your ‘i’ are dotted. I will always thank my lucky stars that someone was looking over me on that cold crisp morning in winter…must of been my guardian angel…must of been my nana!

My message to everyone….be careful, be vigilant and always be cautious!

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Cuddles from my babies were a calming comfort after my close call…my wake up call!!!

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A Letter to Nana….

Dear Nana,

I can’t believe it’s been 2 years since I saw, touched and kissed your beautiful face. 2 years since you took your last breath on this earth and grew your angel wings. So much has happened in the past 2 years. Lots of ups and downs and there isn’t a day that goes by where we don’t wish you were here with us, enjoying in what life has to offer.

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I still find it extremely difficult to be in your home. Your presence is so raw and real and although it brings me comfort, it also breaks my heart and is a harsh reminder of what we are missing! I admire grandad for being so strong. It would have been so easy to walk away from all the memories, but instead he embraces it and has allowed it to help heal his heart, that will never fully recovery from losing you.

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Grandad is going well though. He misses you more and more everyday, but between us all, we make sure he is looked after. He travels with us to watch the kids play sport, relishes in his time at family dinners and enjoys his outings with Kane to Bunnings and the pub!

Mum has been, like always, the glue that holds us altogether. In her darkest days of grieving for you, she always makes sure that everyone else is ok. She is granddad’s sounding board and when he broke his hip, she took tremendous care of him just like she use to take care of you! You’ve raised an amazing women in my mummy nana so thank you!

You should see all the great-grandchildren now:)! Sadly you never got to meet baby Ada who is our newest member to the family! Megan and Shannon’s wishes came true and what a gorgeous wish she is! All the kids have grown so much and are striving to their best potential, especially in their sport! They all talk about you all the time and Mia asks me everyday why did nana have to die?!? Knowing you’re not suffering or in pain anymore is the only thing that puts my mind at ease just a little with losing you!

I miss you so much nana. I miss our chats about TV shows and celebrity goss, swearing together during these chats ended up in many laughing moments and I’d do anything to have that again. I miss the sound of your sweet voice, the touch of your soft hands and your cuddles – they will always be my favourite! I miss that you’re not hear watching our lives evolve and cheering us on with whatever we are doing in life…I just miss you!

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You may not be here in person anymore, but you are never excluded from our thoughts, conversations and special occasions. I hope this letter finds you, wherever you are. I hope that you are happy, content and enjoying the freedom you deserve!

I love you nana – until we meet again….

Nat….xoxoxox!

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